Awareness of Emotions

Rude People Lack Self-Awareness

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We’ve all met people who seem to enjoy being rude or do things that annoy or hurt others. This type of person usually doesn’t have a lot of self-awareness because, if they did, they would realize the consequences of their behaviors. People behave rudely for a variety of reasons including:

  • Insecurity and lack of self-esteem.
  • Fear of letting people get closer.
  • Lack of appropriate role models.
  • Inability to feel empathy.
  • Need to dominate others.
  • Protect themselves from people hurting them.
  • Negative attention-seeking behavior.
  • They’ve been hurt in the past and take it out on others.
  • Habit.
  • Lack of self-awareness.

People who behave rudely don’t usually do things consciously, they behave the way they do because they feel something horrible inside and don’t know what else to do.

The good news is that anyone can change direction, stop behaving like a jerk, and live a happier life by increasing their self-awareness. It starts with reflecting on who they are and healing their hurts so they can treat themselves and others well.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and avoid behaving rudely?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Emotional Intelligence

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Self-awareness and emotional intelligence are closely linked and when you have one, you’re likely to have the other. Let’s define the two, look at how they compliment each other, and how they can help you live a happier life.

The Definition of Self-Awareness

The ability to get to know yourself so well that you understand and are able to control how you feel, think, and behave in order to move your life in a positive, deeply meaningful direction with an intimate knowledge of who you really are deep inside.

The Definition of Emotional Intelligence

The ability to recognize, experience, understand, and modulate your own and others’ emotions, thoughts, and behaviors.

As you can see, these two concepts have a lot in common because they both refer to the ability to know yourself well enough to live a happy life instead of doing stuff that aggravates you and others. I’ve worked with a lot of people over the years to help them increase their self-awareness and emotional intelligence, here are some of the things they look at in order to grow and succeed:

  • Healing the unresolved, painful, or hurtful issues from their childhoods.
  • Taking an honest look at what they’re doing that doesn’t work.
  • Learning and practicing new, positive thoughts and behaviors.
  • Realizing emotions are positive and learning how to feel them.
  • Discovering who they really are deep inside and doing the things they love.
  • Living life authentically, from their hearts.
  • Practicing love, kindness, compassion, caring, both toward themselves and others.
  • Doing the hard work necessary to become healthy, including going to therapy for as long as it takes.
  • Having the courage to live life as their real selves.

Self-aware people possess emotional intelligence and vice versa. There is no mystery behind either concept, they just require work and a dedication to learn how to deal with emotions, thoughts, and actions. The end result of developing both is that you get to enjoy a wonderful life being the real, healthy you.

Cheers,

Guy

What Self-Awareness Isn’t

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A lot of people think self-awareness happens simply by saying you have it. This leads to people insisting that they understand themselves well while leaving a trail of destruction wherever they go. Here are some examples of what self-awareness isn’t:

  • Saying you do one thing and then doing another.
  • Having various parts of your life in conflict.
  • Saying you care about people but treating certain ones poorly.
  • Insisting you’re happy and balanced when you have a lot of unfinished inner business to deal with.
  • You say you love yourself but you do things that hurt you.
  • Thinking and behaving in ways that hurt others.
  • Saying that other people don’t have self-awareness and then doing things that demonstrate you don’t.

Getting to know yourself well is an ongoing process where you comprehend why you think and do certain things and continuously move your life in a positive direction. You become so comfortable with yourself that you treat others with great care and compassion because you’re deeply happy inside. What will you do to keep building self-awareness?

Cheers,

Guy

Self Awareness and Saying I’m Sorry

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The ability to say, “I’m sorry,” is a big part of self-awareness. Countless misunderstandings and conflicts arise because people are unwilling to back down or admit that they made a mistake. The irony is that, in trying to avoid being wrong, people make the situation worse. When something goes awry, it’s much more productive to think in these types of terms:

  • There’s nothing wrong with making a mistake.
  • You don’t have to be right all the time to be a good person.
  • It’s positive to take the other person’s feelings into account.
  • You can learn and grow by examining what you did.
  • You don’t have to win.
  • You don’t have to save face.
  • Admitting you made a mistake is a positive sign of self-awareness.
  • You take responsibility for your actions and how they affect others.
  • You’re healthy enough to not have to dominate or control others.

Saying, “I’m sorry,” doesn’t mean that you let people step all over you, it’s simply an acknowledgement that you’re willing and able to reflect on what you did and work on improving the situation. Self-awareness allows you to step back, evaluate your thoughts and behaviors, take responsibility, and make corrections. What will you do to say, “I’m sorry,” more freely?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Honesty

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If you’ve been building your self-awareness over time, you realize how important honesty is to becoming a well-rounded, happy, healthy human being. Personal growth means you’re committed to taking a candid, honest look at your thinking, feelings and behaviors and making positive changes. If you start from a position of trying to hide who you really are or pretending you’re someone else, you’ll likely avoid looking at the areas that could really benefit from some attention. A more effective approach is to decide to improve yourself each day so you can live an open, genuinely fulfilling life without having to cover things up.

A lot of people create unnecessary difficulties in their lives because they refuse to honestly appraise what they think, feel and do. They exist day to day compensating for or tiptoeing around issues that hold them back instead of dealing with them directly and taking action to improve the situation long-term. Self-aware individuals understand that self-examination is a vital, necessary part of personal development. As you live your life, think of the things you do well and the things that hold you back. Work hard to heal the issues in your past that prevent you from completely enjoying your life. Experience the joy that comes from letting go of the things that don’t work and become the healthiest you possible. What will you do to be honest with yourself?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Creating Positive Vibes

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Like anyone who is working on building his or her self-awareness and trying to spread positive vibes in the world, my patience and interpersonal skills are often tested. I recently went through a really challenging experience where a series of negative things happened over a period of several days. At the end of the ordeal I was left with a stark choice:

  1. Fight.
  2. Move on and live kindly and peacefully.

Regrettably, I initially chose number one and it took an awful toll on me. I felt like I was creating all kinds of negative energy; making not only myself but others unhappy. I struggled with my feelings about the situation and finally discovered what was bothering me so much: I was creating negative vibes instead of living my life how I really want to, with self-awareness, kindness, and grace.

As a thinking, feeling person, I had the ability to behave any way I wanted and I chose a less than wonderful course of action. When I realized that I was acting in a way that wasn’t leading down a positive path, I consciously moved in a more self-aware, beneficial direction. This deliberate decision not only made my life easier but also created a better world because there was one less person creating negative energy, me.

I love consulting for people who value self-awareness because they try to understand how their thoughts and actions actions affect other people and the world in general. They also work hard to build a better world for themselves and others. What will you do to develop self-awareness and create positive vibes?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Reduces Anger

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One of the biggest benefits of building self-awareness is that it reduces anger. If you wake up each day and don’t pursue your dreams, go to a job you hate, hang out with people who don’t value the real you, stuff your feelings, or pretend you’re fulfilled, you’re very likely to be upset. Living this way leads to anger because you’re just not happy. Here are some ideas on how you can use self-awareness to improve the situation:

  • Agree with yourself to move in a new direction.
  • Get to know who you are deep inside.
  • Understand your strengths and areas for improvement.
  • Choose one thing to work on.
  • Take action each day to create movement in your life.
  • Praise yourself each time you notice a positive change.
  • Repeat the process.

People feel unsettled and upset when they’re not living authentically or doing things they find meaningful. What will you do to be less angry?

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy